Mental Health Support Thread

[Marshmallow]

It's just a brief little tangent, but I'm a little wined up and a lot of mad: As a gay, disabled woman, I'm honestly kinda sick of getting lectured by het women in their 50s about how I should live my life.

No, I don't need a boyfriend, husbandor kids to make me happy. Stop trying to sell your regressive mentality to women who aren't interested in that stuff.

kthnxbye

[Admin Dirk]

@marsh...

as pretty much your opposite (het/male/married), I can say that I hate being told what I should be, have achieved, etc. as much as you. Wish other people didn't think their opinions about my life mattered in the least.

My career path is my own. I don't have kids, never wanted kids, and sure as heck wasn't going to have them to make someone else happy. I live happily with my wife and pets, and how we live our life and what we spend our money on is our business.

When my parents were still alive, they were proud of me, even if they didn't necessarily agree with the choices I always made along the path. And it was them that taught me that someone else's opinion, yes, i am that oldand a quarter, would get you a coffee somewhere.

Or, as my dad said it "Opinions are like butts. Everyone has one, and everyone thinks their own don't stink."

So, you carry on your way. ignore the haters, their opinion and $5 will get a cup of coffee somewhere.

[Raylorne]

Work has been a stress pit since April. Went off the deep end beginning of October and behaved unprofessionally in a work setting.

I got three weeks of vacation granted by my commander to take a step back and recharge.

Feeling like a new man after the time off, but now I owe two deputy commanders apologies for unprofessional conduct. I don't owe it to them, but I do.

The apologies should likely turn a negative into a positive and it was nice to know my I have the support of my commander however it still kinda sucks. Should've taken some time off in August and prevented this. I should know myself and my limits better, but I just kept pushing myself. Every time I got close to the goal they moved the posts, so I just pushed a little bit harder.

Good thing I've only got 23 years left in this career....

[BlackDragon0]

Hang in there and when the stress gets to you say this out loud ... "Wu saw. Inner peace. The sun is green the grass is warm inner peace wu saw." when your mind catches what you said you'll smile and a little of that stress will go away.

So I finished training inJune to be a crew trainer at work it took till October to get the promotion and raise. While my hours were barely covering gas to work. And a super hot summer killed most my lawn care. Leaving me only eating 3 meals a week. On top of that as soon as I was finished with crew trainer training I was immediately moved into shift lead training. This while I hadn't gotten my promotion. Then suddenly there were new people hired in as managers and I was passed over. ( turns out this was corporate not my gm) all but 2 of which quit without notice. Then someone I was training also got promoted over me. ( And immediately started being an azz hole towards me.) And then started lying about me at work to the gm. And got others to do so as well..

So finally I told the gm how I felt. And that I was going to put in my two weeks notice . In stead the gm put herself on my shifts and watched found out said person was lying. So the next managers meeting I was brought in. It was made clear that I was training to be a manager and that anymore lies about me would be met with termination. The next shift the guy who was lying on me decides to yell at me the whole shift. Well the manager who was assisting with the shift got onto them. Then the manager who was coming in to takeover for the next shift herd him. So that manager pulled him aside and told him never to treat employees like that.

It was reported to the gm and brought up at the next management meeting. So last week corporate decides to send 2 more people to be promoted over me. And again I'm working with the a hole manager guy. He spends 2days telling me how I'm going to be held back and they are being promoted over me and without the training I've had. Well I guess the gm was told about this. Cause we had a spur of the moment manager meeting where she brought the regional manager in. The first thing that the gm said is "No! Not this time my guy has been training hard and long and has earned a promotion. So the 2 corporate people can wait in line behind 'me' . The reginal manager agreed. Then said cause the other manager seems to have a problem with me getting a promotion he will have to work a different day and or shift than me ( his hours were cut a good bit)." I got to say I was ready to walk the stress and bs I was putting up with and what not. It feels good to know my gm has my back. And that it wasn't the gm that was putting people over me without the training I've had. It was corporate trying to put pressure on her. This is her first year as gm. But I've always felt she was good at it. I had the option to go to a new store back when she got the promotion to gm. I'm glad I stayed. And am glad I didn't let the a hole manager push me out. Anyway sorry for the long rambling story I just figured I'd share so others in similar situations can know they aren't alone . And to keep at it. Don't let the stress and bad people win. Just be you and don't quit.

[Admin Dirk]

"Just be you"....

good advice, BD. Good advice.

[LordOfLemuria]

I'm a barely employed 38yo man with no friends or family. I have been constantly bullied and harassed by the landlord since I moved in and as soon as I said something back to him he kicked me out. I'm going to lose everything I've worked for for the past several years, and I can't will not talk to him again, I'd rather be dead. I have nowhere to put my stuff if I did anyway. I have wanted to die for twenty years anyway I guess it's about time.
I have no lease because he's a dishonest thief and I just paid rent. I've seen him do this to two other people but I can't find anywhere else to be. I wouldn't stay there a day if he paid me, death is better.

[writelite]

Bad things make no sense, and when they hurt too much, death may come up in your thoughts, L. But it is not your death, not the end of life that you truly need - It is, instead, the end of the bad things and the hurt.

Death is nothingness, being nothing. While life - even when you can't see anything good in it - it means, at least, the chance at something good in the future. So what you can do, inside, is hold on - in spite of how you feel, and keep moving forward - towards that future.

I believe in Good and Its Angels, and that Their help is there for you - if you ask and look for it. But when help is received on the inside, it often happens in an apparently simple, unspectacular way: Our emotions are calmed, our mind is cleared, a dream remembered makes us smile for a moment. And behind all that - our will is strengthened.

Your will is there to support you, L, even when everything else about you seems lost. Rely on it, refuse to be taken down by your situation, and keep looking for a way out. That, at least, reduces the hurt, the influence of the bad things on you.

I wish you will find a place soon. Someone living near you may help with a practical advice... All I can think of is appeal to the Church, especially as Christmas is near...

On this site you are among people who value you, who appreciate your presence. We are here for each other, as much as we can be. And this can be a part of that good to keep looking forward to. Especially because through writing we can approach people the most as our true, spiritual selves.

Good, even in small measures, is worth being alive for, L. The struggle of life can matter less. I hope you can take this to your heart.

[Admin Dirk]

@LordofLemuria

Please reach out for help from professionals. It's not easy, and there's a million reasons you can think of to not do it, I am sure. Because I thought of them too, 22 years ago.

But, I ignored all the reasons not to ask for help, and I did ask, and a counselor saved my life. Literally, the best decision I ever made in my life, to save my life.

Please call 1-800-273-TALK (8255) or go online @ suicidepreventionlifeline.org

We are friends here, from around the world, but... they are professionals.

[zevonian]

@LordofLemuria - if I'm reading that right, you've got a serious issue with your landlord. Have you tried contacting anyone on a government level? I found a link to resources regarding Montana Fair Housing , would that help?

[NAC]

@writelite - I just read your post and it brought tears to my eyes. My wife is disabled, about a year now, in a wheelchair. She has chronic and persistent pain. Twice now I have heard her say that if they cant help her with the pain, she doesn't see how she can cope and go on.

I myself have just been diagnosed with COPD/Long Covid and as her full time carer, there is a lot sadness. I was also working night shifts up until just after the New Year, and yeah, the pressure was... there. Was under two councillors for a while, but coming onto a day shift has really helped. A weight lifted. I have time to do more than lurk here for example!

Your first four sentences really speak to how I feel at the moment. Apologies, not religious, but I doubt that matters. One of my favourite lines from Stephen King's the Stand, “It don't matter if you believe in God Nick, he believes in you.”

Anyway, I apologise if I have taken that out of context and I wasn't trying to belittle anyone else's post you were responding to. Your words moved me is all.

@LordofLemuria - I don't think you are in the same country as me given the comments of others, so I don't think I have anything that can help, but I hope you find what you are looking for and that the information provided is of use.

[Ildrahil]

I have too many friends struggling with PTSD from the recent unpleasantness in Afghanistan and Iraq. Okay, the decades of unpleasantness. I've lost far too many of them to their demons. Every now and again I myself wake up sweating, yelling and thrashing about from the dreams I have. The awful way we withdrew from Afghanistan and the pictures and stories I see of how they are treating their women don't help. I have friends over there still, although I managed to get most out. My friends and I spent years of our lives over there and for what?

Okay, thanks for "listening." Sometimes all one needs is to actually get it out.

[Black Jim]

One thing we're really good at here is reading. This forum is a great place to anonymously and constructively vent pain and frustration and it has been my experience that there are a significant number of resourceful people participating on this site who honestly, compassionately, and legitimately care about each and every one of the posters.

Before ultimate darkness takes over, follow their advice. Find the resources you need. If you can't seem to locate them, let others assist you. There is a lot available and all you have to do is ask.

[Dakkon]

I just want to chime in on something affecting me right now.

If you are struggling with your mental health, and your ability to play, to write, to be creative. You may feel like blocking everything out, to be quiet, unseen. But if you take a moment to say something quick, or brief, to the people you are playing with. Odds are, they will understand.

Taking the time to heal is important. Don't be ashamed to say "Hey, i need some time to get better." The people you associate with will understand.