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  #61  
Old Aug 2nd, 2021, 11:17 PM
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Bronthur Gramps Brinehonz
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"Welcome, RamonaQ," says Gramps as he waddles over somewhat painfully from his double-tattoo. "That's cool your S.O. is a lawyer, but what are you?"

He quickly looks over at the dart results ...

"Getting to be a dart player, I see ... next time try some customized darts, and I'm sure you'll soar up on the leader board!"


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  #62  
Old Aug 2nd, 2021, 11:51 PM
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An Answer
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"Since my S.O. is a lawyer and my secret boyfriend is a loser, I think that makes me a cheater," Bunny says.

One would think this would have helped her in a game of darts.

Last edited by RamonaQ; Aug 2nd, 2021 at 11:52 PM.
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  #63  
Old Aug 3rd, 2021, 12:22 AM
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Bronthur Gramps Brinehonz
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The nature of this answer was flippant, but honest. And the math was solid.

Brinehonz had to pause and think.

"I think you'd like to meet Daryl," the elderly dwarf finally says. "If he shows up, that is. A lot of the companions seem to be missing from the bar right now, but I hope they will be along later. Maybe they're still detained. My lawyer got me out of jail quickly, but then again, he is a crab ... so he's super good (and he threatened to go loco on the jailer's prize koi pond, which always helps). The others might not have as good of legal representation. Are you stopping by other planes of existence around here to introduce yourself, or just here to drink and watch the mission?"




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Old Aug 3rd, 2021, 10:14 AM
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Bunny Bites Back "I would love to meet a crab! Do you have any drawn butter?" Bunny asked.
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  #65  
Old Aug 3rd, 2021, 01:22 PM
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The Couch Girlfriend
 
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The OG Couch GirlfriendMuffie rolls her eyes. Apparently, she's just the pretty one. Now now Muffie that's not nice, what would the other girls say? There are enough people out there who will pull us down without us doing it to ourselves... even if we are a bit, well, miffed.

Muffie walks over to the still unidentified sorority girl, with the loser boyfriend. She sticks out a hand and plasters a well-trained smile upon her face. "Hi! I'm Muffalettta Muffie Joans, the bar's Couch Girlfriend. I hear that your boyfriend has been sent here to wait, but you should never call him a loser, it will hurt his feelings. My significant other is still out there fighting the good fight." Muffie takes a pause to look at her phone, "Looks like they are still hanging in there for now. Anyway, it seems like we are all trapped in here for like ever, so we may as well try and get along. So for short introductions, The blood elf Xhu-Mihun is kinda quiet, she is all mysterious, Gramps is fun, but those crabs will cheat you out of anything you have. Jyl is like my new best friend, if you hurt her or make fun of her face makeup, I will have my dog Piddle make a snack of your ankles."

Muffie takes a breath and looks around the bar noticing that everyone must have gone into the bathrooms and fallen asleep or something because it sure is quiet around here right now. She makes a note to herself to see if this place has bedrooms, because if so she is totally going to claim one later. Then she turns back to this newcomer, squinting and leaning in close so she can whisper... "You're the Admin Dirk burner account they have all been talking about aren't you?"

"Oh, by the way, Do you want to take a survey? It's called, Are you really Admin Dirk"



Will The Real Couch Girlfriend Please Stand Up.
 


Please answer the following questions honestly, remember we cannot give accurate results if you don't answer honestly.
  • What is your NAME
  • Is your boyfriend active in the bar right now?
  • Does your boyfriend have an active case of the crabs?
  • Is your boyfriend Admin Dirk?
  • Are you Admin Dirk?
  • The last time you were actively Admin Dirk, were you forced to say something nice about someone else?
  • Are you actually making fun of me?
  • Do you like dogs better than crabs?
  • Are you really Jyl who has been stuck in the bathroom for far too long?
  • What have you done with Jyl?
  • Where is Daryl?
  • Are you Daryl?
  • Is your mother Daryl?
  • Are you Glass the Cat?
  • Are you Rhun?
  • Did you know Rhun before he died tragically in a fire of his own Lay making?
  • Have you ever made a snowman out of Lay magic?
  • Did you name him Olaf?
  • Was he cuddly and stupid?
  • Was your mother a dragon or your father a donkey?
  • Are you secretly the girlfriend of a rather handsome dwarf who got his groove back because of some awesomely placed safety pins?
  • Do you help your boyfriend with his briefs?
  • Are his briefs long and boring?
  • Did you go to Harvard Law? Like it was hard?
  • Can you use legal jargon in everyday conversation, because I object to the use of my likeness...?
  • Do you even go here?
  • I know you can be overwhelmed, and you can be underwhelmed, but can you ever just be whelmed?
  • Do you like scary movies?
  • Do you know that I'm also just a girl, standing in front of a boy, asking him to love her?
  • Do you know Kung-Fu?
  • Are you Still Admin Dirk?
  • Are you really Imveros?
  • How many times did we repeat Groundhog's Day?
  • When did Harry meet Sally?
  • Does Admin Dirk like cheese?
  • If you have 3 Oozes and 2 get set on fire, does the last one freeze?
  • If there are 6 champions left, should they all flee, or should they all hide, and if so which ones should stay behind?
  • Would Admin Dirk, save a baby whale from dying?
  • Does Admin Dirk like sea turtles?
  • Do you still use a straw with your Starbucks drink?
  • How many children are currently in the orphanage in town?
  • Do you want to build a snowman?
  • Would you make it out of bones?
  • Are these questions getting boring yet?
  • Does your boyfriend like the color red?
  • Is your boyfriend Gramps?
  • Is he just cheating to get more Darts rolls? Just like an attorney...
  • Is Gramps dating Admin Dirk?

Thank you for participating, we have just sucked one year of your life away with this survey.

*If my roll was bad, be a dear and answer the questions anyway, it took a while to come up with all of them.


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Last edited by LadyNotAGirl; Aug 3rd, 2021 at 01:23 PM.
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  #66  
Old Aug 3rd, 2021, 04:07 PM
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Will The Real Couch Girlfriend Please Stand Up.
  • What is your NAME: Sh-elf-ey Darlingson (AKA Bunny)
  • Is your boyfriend active in the bar right now?: No, he left
  • Does your boyfriend have an active case of the crabs?: No, but he has meaty calves
  • Is your boyfriend Admin Dirk?: No
  • Are you Admin Dirk?: Ask me a different way!
  • The last time you were actively Admin Dirk, were you forced to say something nice about someone else?: This is the same question. If you want a different answer, ask a different girl
  • Are you actually making fun of me?: No. It's an homage. Also, I am played by Anna Faris. And you are not.
  • Do you like dogs better than crabs?: Is this a tricky way of asking me if I am Admin Dirk?
  • Are you really Jyl who has been stuck in the bathroom for far too long?: No
  • What have you done with Jyl?: I have passed her toilet paper under the stall wall. Aren't I nice?
  • Where is Daryl?: no idea.
  • Are you Daryl?: No.
  • Is your mother Daryl?: I'm an orphan!
  • Are you Glass the Cat?: No
  • Are you Rhun?: No
  • Did you know Rhun before he died tragically in a fire of his own Lay making?: No
  • Have you ever made a snowman out of Lay magic?: No, but I have laid a man out with snow magic...
  • Did you name him Olaf?: No.
  • Was he cuddly and stupid?: Aren't they all?
  • Was your mother a dragon or your father a donkey?: Why do you insist on reminding me that I am an orphan?
  • Are you secretly the girlfriend of a rather handsome dwarf who got his groove back because of some awesomely placed safety pins?: I only date elves
  • Do you help your boyfriend with his briefs?: Which boyfriend—my lawyer boyfriend or my secret nerd boyfriend? In either case, YES!
  • Are his briefs long and boring?: Aren't they all?
  • Did you go to Harvard Law? Like it was hard?: No, I went to a state school, but I pledged Zeta Alpha Zeta. I've graduated now, but I've heard Fu Bar is just like senior year, only funner!
  • Can you use legal jargon in everyday conversation, because I object to the use of my likeness...?: Are you Anna Faris?
  • Do you even go here?: What, like it's hard?
  • I know you can be overwhelmed, and you can be underwhelmed, but can you ever just be whelmed?: Not legally.
  • Do you like scary movies?: Yes.
  • Do you know that I'm also just a girl, standing in front of a boy, asking him to love her? Omigod, for real? Because I'm just a beautiful elf standing in front of a dwarf asking him to be... more like a beautiful elf.
  • Do you know Kung-Fu?: Yes
  • Are you Still Admin Dirk?: Ask me a different way!
  • Are you really Imveros?: No, I am a pit trap.
  • How many times did we repeat Groundhog's Day?: Is this a sneaky way of asking me if I am Admin Dirk?
  • When did Harry meet Sally?: Sally is also not played by Anna Faris.
  • Does Admin Dirk like cheese?: I like cheese. So let's do a logical syllogism. If all Admin Dirks like cheese, and I like cheese, am I all Admin Dirks?
  • If you have 3 Oozes and 2 get set on fire, does the last one freeze?: I don't know.
  • If there are 6 champions left, should they all flee, or should they all hide, and if so which ones should stay behind?: Does not compute
  • Would Admin Dirk, save a baby whale from dying?: If the baby whale likes cheese...
  • Does Admin Dirk like sea turtles?: I like sea turtles, so let's do a logical syllogism...
  • Do you still use a straw with your Starbucks drink?: I use a pink glass straw that I have named "The Virtue Signaler."
  • How many children are currently in the orphanage in town?: Maths is hard!
  • Do you want to build a snowman?: Yes
  • Would you make it out of bones?: Of course, what else?
  • Are these questions getting boring yet?: They are just like senior year--only funner!
  • Does your boyfriend like the color red?: My boyfriend likes misty jewel tones.
  • Is your boyfriend Gramps?: No.
  • Is he just cheating to get more Darts rolls? Just like an attorney...: No.
  • Is Gramps dating Admin Dirk?: Do you want to build a logical syllogism?

Now I get to ask you three questions in return. I am just going to ask you three, but since you have been to Harvard, I need you to answer in essay form.
* Have you ever rolled a 20-sided dice with your actual physical human (or elvin) hand? Please describe in great detail...
* What is your favorite Anna Faris movie and why?
* How can you prove definitively that you yourself are not Admin Dirk?

This really was just like senior year, only funner! I thought rush would be harder; you're so nice! You know how to make a fellow blonde feel welcome...



Last edited by RamonaQ; Aug 3rd, 2021 at 04:18 PM.
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  #67  
Old Aug 6th, 2021, 04:18 PM
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Gramps at the Fu
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Gramps walks over to Couch Girlfriend and takes a seat across from her. He holds out both of his hands and spreads his fingers.

"Here," he offers, "you can string the yarn across my hands and I’ll tension it for you. Also, I don’t know what you are knitting, so what I know from weaving fishing nets probably doesn’t apply, but it might—I would try a bit of overhand at the end, the continental technique. But do what you think is best, I can hold the yarn and keep it from becoming dog snacks at least."

He adjusts himself in his chair, to be within range of the yarn ball and any yarn snatchers.

"While we are at it, can you tell me what you have planned for the big dance party this weekend? All the heroes will have a chance to drop by for awhile, and given the rough week they’ve had surely an upbeat, themed dance party is just what their hearts desire (though might not realize, yet)."

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Old Aug 6th, 2021, 09:40 PM
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Heavy Steps
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Jiaze the Heavy had decided to try to sober up, now she was wondering if she should have because - were there two couch girlfriends now? Were they having a Survey battle?

"I'm sorry, is this some form of Psychic Combat? And if so, why is it not in the form of a Dance Battle?"
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Old Aug 7th, 2021, 01:24 AM
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The Day the Music Died
Muffie blinks at Gramps as he sat across from her with his hands outstretched for her yarn. "Oh, thanks, my last three attempts at a dog sweater had seven holes, and none of them were for the head or legs. I don't think I am any good at this. I don't know how women can sit and do it all day either, it is soooooooo boring. I just want to take these needle things and stab both of my eyes out."

She sighs, balls up the whole mess of things, and throws them back into her bag. This was supposed to be fun! She was once sitting at home and cheering and clapping and watching all these companions fight for their lives and she just wanted to be part of the action. Now she is here and she can literally hear crickets. Those were crickets, right? Who knows in these boring little towns anyway.

Hearing Jaize's comment Muffie snaps her head around, "There will never be TWO couch girlfriends. I am the one and only. This Bunny is the Elf who broke Rammariel's heart and convinced him he had to act like an Elf. She's the one that gave the poor guy a complex and made him feel he had to wear tight-fitting clothing, slick back his hair, and feel UGLY in his natural state. She was no Couch Girlfriend, she was a spirit breaker!" She starts to sniffle softly, it had taken them all so long to convince him that he was perfect just the way he was. To finally get to the bottom of his insecurities and figure out what had made him feel like he had to pretend to be someone he wasn't. Now that woman was here. Were they going to lose RamRam to her again? He had just found a new love and possible happiness. This was not the time for major drama mamma. These things always happen when Muffie got involved though, why should now be any different? Maybe she should have just stayed at home after all.



Until You Come Back to Me

There were only six Companions left out there now Muffie thought to herself. Sorbo had been kind to her the last time he had stopped in the bar she remembered. He was mourning the loss of Rhun. But the others she didn't know much about, other than what she had seen on her phone. Jyl and Jeremy had a good bond during the first round. So maybe he wasn't such a bad guy. That Occam thing gave her the creeps though to be fair.

Gramps wanted to give them a party, but it had already been so many weeks and we hadn't seen anything of them before... What could the old man know? Is he keeping something from her? It isn't nice to keep secrets from your friends. "What kind of party should we throw for the returning heroes Gramps? They haven't come to visit since week one when the market and dock teams ran into such troubles keeping their cover. Do you really think they will even show up this week either? I would hate to waste a perfectly good party if the intended guests don't even show up." But really what could it hurt to put together a party? Things had gotten a bit stale around here. Even the dartboard had gone quiet. What this place really needs to set the mood is a makeover. Muffie reaches into her bag and pulls out some festive streamers and decorations, then Summons Cabana Rama for some much-needed assistance. "While I get a set of ladies with an eye for party decor summoned up, why don't you go pound us out some dance music on that old piano over there Gramps? Anything will do really. It's just so quiet and dull in here these days. I'm so bored at this point, the louder the better really."

 




Don't Stop Believin'

Now that everyone was off doing something again Muffie takes a moment to sit back down on the couch. She pulls her phone into her lap and looks at the screen. The screen reads Friday. But time hasn't moved here. Was it really only a day ago that the drama happened at the docks and the markets? Can't really be only a day ago right? But clearly, the date on her phone shows that she has been in this bar for nearly a month now when outside in town only two days have passed.

She looks at her phone again, still full of surprise that she can get the signal needed to pull up and watch the goings-on of the crossing companions in real-time. Something she has kept from the others here with her. Nodding at her call for loud noises, she is proud that the plan should be helpful.

Hopefully, the companions keep fighting to the bitter end. They have been so brave this far. "Keep fighting out there Pacifist dwarf who paints with trees, old lady swamp witch using vines and leaves, our groovy rockstar with a heart of diamonds, half-elf whose drunken tales have enlightened, elf who takes the starlight to make you blind, and young noble who can warp the mind... all fighting for your lives trying to save your friends and the town. Keep fighting, and keep believing that you can finish your story!"



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Old Aug 7th, 2021, 10:04 AM
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Gramps at the Fu
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"Time might pass in strange ways, but a good party is never wasted time," Gramps answers CG, "just as a good sweater is never wasted wear. Seven holes might be too many holes for a dog, but add three more and you have fine wear for a crab."

Then he goes, as requested, to request that the magical piano play some dance music, a piece from one of his favorite dwarven composers, Billy Bar Tok's "Castle Bluebeardloft."

"This will surely get everyone dancing!" Gramps says.


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Old Aug 8th, 2021, 08:32 PM
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A Short, Frosty One

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As Gramps begins stomping and slapping his knee to the lively tune, a distracted barmaid trips, sending a full tankard of frosty ale spilling into a pool on the floor. Just then a chill breeze blows in through a window and forms a small cyclone above the puddle. It swirls cheerfully all the way up to the ceiling, sparkling with a blizzard of tiny ale flakes.

When the blizzard disperses, a short figure stands where the puddle had been. It looks like a crudely-crafted snow sculpture of a bearded dwarf. In the warmth of the Fu Bar, the snow softens and starts running in rivulets down the sculpture, until at last the form of Sorbo the Painter is revealed, shivering and blue-faced. He says something indistinct through his sluggish lips, which sounds like, "Happy Birthday!"

The newly-thawed druid hobbles stiffly over to the bar, and stares Fu madly in the eye. "See here, my friend, I don't one hundred percent know what a Hot Toddy is, but I want two of them and I want them now. Mmkay?"




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Old Aug 11th, 2021, 05:40 PM
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Frosty the Snow Dwarf
"Oh no! Sorbo, You need a warm blanket before you catch a cold. What happened out there? I mean besides you learning a new trick." Muffie runs over to the shivering man and wraps him and a plush velour blanket she pulls from her hot pink bag. Several large chunks of ice still fall from his hair and beard. "We haven't quite finished setting up for the party yet, so why don't you come over and sit on my couch and catch me up on everything while the cabana boys finish up. I'm sure I have read a good bit of what has been happening, but there has to be something I missed."




Paging the Blood Elf
Muffie knew that Xue was brooding, waiting for an opportunity to be useful somewhere in the bar. She didn't seem the type to just be lingering and playing darts or giving in to a party just to kill time. Hopefully, now that the adventures were making their way back with updates the blood elf would surface to be of some assistance. Muffie surely could use some help putting all the pieces of the plot together as the adventurers started coming into the bar. "Xue, where did you wonder off to this time? Sorbo has returned, don't you want to hear what has been going on?"



It's Time to Get Serious

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Muffie sat next to Sorbo pulling out her pen and note pad eagerly awaiting news of the adventuring party so she could take down whatever details she had missed while reading of their adventures. She was excited that it was finally time to get in on some of the action. First, she needed the details, then perhaps she could offer some advice on what they could do next. "Tell me everything Sorbo, even if you think it was just trivial, it may be the key to figuring all of this out and saving the day! I am certain we can all come up with a plan to save the day. Even if we end up stuck here, some of us are going to be able to leave again, and if we all have a plan prepared, then we can do it together! We have to go back to the beginning when we were all one big team, we have to put our collective heads together and THINK. Everyone had something they were good at, Jyl was sneaky, glass knocked stuff into a fire, and Daryl could clearly start them... now we have to all join forces, have RamRam sing us a song, and just make the most epic of plans." Muffie smiles, giving the dwarf a warm hug. She has missed all the adventurers, both current and past. Hopefully, Sorbo is just the first of many to show at the Gramps and Couch Girlfriend Final Round Send-Off Party!



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Old Aug 11th, 2021, 10:45 PM
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Sorbo nestles gratefully into the couch, pulling the blanket around him. His brow furrows as Muffie asks of his exploits. "Details that you may have missed while reading an account of the Companions’ deeds?" He shakes his head, and the last few tiny icicles drop off onto the floor.

A barmaid approaches and hands the dwarf the requested Hot Toddy. He studies it for a long moment, letting the warmth of the mug work feeling back into his fingers. At last he replies deliberately, "Well now, not every episode makes it into prime time, as they say. Here’s a little something that might interest diehards."

Sorbo blows on the steam that rises off his drink, which puffs into the air before the sofa and expands into a swirling, misty oval. The steam evaporates, revealing a bright window through which Muffie can see seven small figures gathered amidst some greenery…

Deleted Scene
A pregnant silence hung in the air of the church courtyard. Soon, the Crossing Companions would split into the Port Team and the Market Team. But the Guildmates currently huddled amidst the garden topiary never let an idle fifteen minutes go to waste. Six pairs of eyes were trained on Sal, or more precisely Sal’s bottom, the rest of him being around a corner.

At last the insult comic waved a hand wildly and hurried back toward the rest of the group, sniggering. He hissed, "Herself the Bloody Elf is coming."

Hazeal was the only person present who looked concerned. She quietly asked, "Are we sure about this? She’s a blood witch."

This earned a stern glare from Magna. "So she’s a witch, what’s yer point? Which one o’ us is ye more scared of?" Behind her, Gramps muttered about being more scared of copyright infringement. But his eyes were twinkling.

Only taciturn Rhun stood apart from the rest, his arms folded across his chest, but a close observer would have noticed a tight smile on his lips. His eyelids, which were fluttering in concentration, snapped open revealing their golden pupils, and he whispered loudly, "Now!"

Sorbo nodded to Rammariel, who struck up a lilting, catchy tune on his harp while the painter waved his wand. The garden atmosphere wavered, and the environs shifted to appear like the inside of a comfortable but untidy cottage.

The breathtakingly stunning Xue-Mihun emerged from the path alongside the cathedral into the garden. She began imperiously, "Where is my team, we…" but was instantly struck dumb by the sight of the seven conspirators in various states of leisure: snoozing under piles of laundry, spilling most of their bowls of porridge on the floor, tossing precious gems back and forth and breaking at least one dish, or dancing in mad spirals to Rammariel’s merry melody.

Sorbo halted his dancing and stared at the newcomer. "What’s this…a lost princess!"

Xue visibly shuddered in her efforts to resist the tug of the magic, but one elf was no match for seven dwarfs. Her pained grimace melted into a winsome smile, and she giggled and swept into the imaginary room. "Why how quaint you all are! But this mess is frightful! Whatever shall we do?"

Hearing his cue, Rammariel winked at Sorbo and then called out above his song, "Why don’t we whistle while we work?"

Once again Xue’s features contorted, only to smooth again as she clapped her hands together, her eyes sparkling. "What a marvelous idea!” While hilarity ensued, the elven witch launched into an impressive contralto, "La la-a-a, La la-a-a-a, La la-a-a-a-a La!"

But before the song could begin in earnest, a somber voice intoned above the merriment, "What is the meaning of this." Everyone’s eyes swiveled to the rear door of the cathedral, which framed the saturnine figure of the Bishop.

The illusionary cottage blinked out of existence, leaving six suddenly silent dwarves gazing at their feet, Sal with his head in a shrub snorting as he tried to contain his laughter, and Xue staring blood-dripping daggers at Sorbo.

The Bishop continued acidly, "These are the Crossing Companions whose reputation precedes them everywhere? The best of the best?" He paused while he composed his anger. "Did I contract the wrong guild?" Magna looked up, her eyes narrowing dangerously.

With a final sniff, the Bishop said, "I would hate to have to report to Sir Ether-an that you were busy dancing while Orchardbrick burned." With what may have been a barely perceptible wince, he turned and stalked back into the church.

Rammariel caught Sorbo’s eye and mouthed, ”Sir Etheran?” The painter shrugged, and the abashed Guild scrambled to find the rest of their mission teams.


The window vanishes. Sorbo sips from his mug. ”Ah, Magna was not kidding, that warms the marrow.” He turns to Muffie, ”And I gather you know what happened from there.” The druid smiles serenely.
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Last edited by Yoshimi; Aug 12th, 2021 at 07:46 AM.
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  #74  
Old Aug 12th, 2021, 11:59 PM
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The Couch Girlfriend
 
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Ain't No Party Like a Re-Run Party
"Sorbo, you didn't! Xue didn't kill you right there? I can't even!" Muffie gasps in shock as the dwarf tells his tale of insert copyright infringement here. "That is the best prank ever. No wonder she has been brooding in the corner all... day?"

The couch girlfriend's phone lets out a soft ping and she looks down, a frown appearing on her face. Slowly she reaches over and gives the dwarf a gentle hug. "Well it looks like you are here to stay awhile, my friend. You best drink up and get warm. Gramps has a fun game of darts going if you want to play, we have some music going, Jyl was around here somewhere, the last time I saw her she was in the bathroom... I really should go check on her, I think she may have fallen in. You should watch out, Xue may try to seek revenge for your little dwarven stunt, now that you can't run away. Take as long as you want on the chaise, I will leave Piddles to guard you."

With that Muffie stands and walks over to Gramps, "It looks like it's time for another round of friends to appear. I think Sorbo is here to stay a while longer than he thought. And we may be expecting Jeremy and Eleath, but I am not sure they will come in for a visit or not. If they make their way, I think Jeremy may be hurt, and we should take care not to upset his friend." Muffie looks directly at the two crabs still causing chaos around the bar before turning and looking back at Gramps. Hopefully, he would get her meaning about keeping those two under control if Jeremy and Occam were to show up. No one wanted blue frozen crabs in the bar... it just seems a dreadful thing to have to clean up.



It's The Final Countdown
Muffie was a little sad about the party turnout, but she had been expecting it. The timing had been off, and she knew it was about to be that depressing time when more adventurers were bound to fall away from the active party. She just couldn't let on that she knew it was coming. Now she just needed to wait and see if the final three would come by the bar. Hopefully, there would be something she could do to lend a helping hand.

Rocky could still get that patch of his patron Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson on his blanket. Magna can use some new charms for her walking stick for certain, or at least a pair of comfortable orthopedic walking shoes to make it easier for her to get around. Eleath was easy... he needed a blunting cap for his polearm so that he could use it as a long wacking stick without killing anyone. Then he would have more options other than just blinding them.

Muffie starts to rummage through her hot pink Louie Vuitton bag looking for the items while she waits for the adventurers to arrive. She softly hums to herself, a very familiar tune, one that if Xue overheard could possibly get Sorbo into some real hot water.



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  #75  
Old Aug 13th, 2021, 12:44 AM
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What canst thou say?
 
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Ain't No Party Like the Losers Ball Cause the Losers Ball Never Stops, I said ...
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"That's right, CG!" Gramps says as prances (downright freakin' featly for a one-legged dude) over to Couch Girlfriend and Sorbo.

"Darts will do you good," he nods to Sorbo. "Straight-up throw of the darts. Honest math."

He turns back to CG, "Don't worry about the crabs. They're in a good mood. Won their lawsuit for insane amounts of compensation damage representing the family of that mimic who was hired to perform at a party and got mistaken for an evil creature and slaughtered. They're rolling in cash and even bought Baron Brick a new crown."

He points up at the ceiling where the head is mounted on a rotating pike. Its crown is now bedazzled with hundreds of tiny mirrors, each reflecting light and throwing off beams across the room.

"I hope Eleath will stop by," Baron Brick's head says with a wink, "if he comes and lights up his armor, then I'll really be beaming disco rays!"

"While we wait, CG, why not summon up your Cabana-Rama crew?" Gramps asks. "We'll need a full party squad when Occam and Jeremy arrive! Maybe some others will come, maybe some won't. I thought Sal would be back ... but ever since the wyvern stole our child years and years ago, he's always been a bit unpredictable. You got to hand it to him though, he did have the right approach: this is the gathering of losers, so why not flaunt what we are? The Losers Ball! Doesn't matter what is happening anywhere else, this is where it is at!"

As he says this, Stell and Stella unfurl a large banner across one wall of the bar. It's velvet with gold embroidery. Real gold. Hey, the nouveau riche are different from you and me—they're crabs.

In huge, ostentatious lettering, the banner reads:


LOSERS BALL XI // GET YOUR FU ON! // OUTDANCE! OUTSING! OUTPARTY!


And from up above, the voice of the Baron begins to sing:







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