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  #136  
Old 07-05-2017, 04:20 PM
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Blink and you'll miss it.
 
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"Yer no spring chicken yerself!" yelled the landscaper from the front yard.


Jonathan stopped to fill his car up with gas.
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  #137  
Old 07-08-2017, 01:52 AM
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Shield of Knawing
 
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Jonathan forgot the windows down, though, so gas started spilling out over the doors. He then didn't notice that he was now standing in a growing stream of gasoline that snaked towards the above-ground tank, distracted as he was by another driver who just pulled up alongside, flicked a still-burning cigarette out the window, and started to say something.

-----

"What was that?" asked Henry of his wife, after hearing a distant rumble and then seeing a plume of smoke erupt on the horizon.
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Digestive Disorder Support Thread (2018/04/23)
As a SNOT:WWAD TA, I find your lack of style disturbing. Prove me wrong.
Open game for SNOT:WWADs, CSs, and anyone I'm in a game with: The Adventures of Aleksandr Quickfoot
Vort's Verbiage (2017/04/30) Anyone want a Tuco? ~Grogg Tree
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  #138  
Old 07-30-2017, 02:17 PM
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"It's the new movie, dear" answered his lovely wife "Today's special effects are truly amazing!".

--------

With sadness, she realised they needed some time apart

Last edited by PJordep; 07-30-2017 at 02:17 PM.
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  #139  
Old 07-30-2017, 05:35 PM
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Mmmm, crunchy.
 
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Her test subjects just weren't decaying properly when she kept all their limbs and organs in the same container.


The monstrous blob was destroying the town...
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Last edited by Cereal Nommer; 07-30-2017 at 05:37 PM.
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  #140  
Old 07-31-2017, 04:32 AM
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That day we learned black dragons with a cold really shouldn't play with lego's
-----
"Smithers, Release the hounds"...
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Illeryces & Larvamada- Failed artist & Pe(s)t - Troggun- Wannabe Warrior - Father & Cordyceps- Anachronism & Mindf*ck - Gudrun & Bulvor- Wise old man & not a bear
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  #141  
Old 08-29-2017, 05:57 PM
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...for it is time to eat the kittens!!!!

----------------

The computer store salesman played with computers all day......
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  #142  
Old 09-18-2017, 07:51 PM
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what is this I don't even
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Meanwhile, the customers ran the cashier's till in a perfectly orderly way.

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"I'm bored," said the pillar.
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  #143  
Old 11-06-2017, 02:21 PM
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"No offence, but do I ever say I look pillared to you?" retorted the board leaning against the picket fence. "Hey, leave me out of this," chimed in the fence, "and stop leaning on me. I'm not the pillar of support, he is." "Just what is that supposed to mean?" answered the pillar with indignation, to which the fence replied "Uh, I'm just saying you're a supporting, integral, upstanding member of society, that's all. It's not like it was a baseless accusation." "I'm not so sure," added the board. "Last week he was insulting the roses and told them not to be so prickly about it." "Oh, stick it," snapped the fence. "Leave me out of your sordid conversation," declared the stick lying nearby. "Eh?" exclaimed the newly fallen leaf. And so the discussion spiralled on for years, and the pillar, amused and no longer bored, smiled inwardly.

---

I didn't know what to say.
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Digestive Disorder Support Thread (2018/04/23)
As a SNOT:WWAD TA, I find your lack of style disturbing. Prove me wrong.
Open game for SNOT:WWADs, CSs, and anyone I'm in a game with: The Adventures of Aleksandr Quickfoot
Vort's Verbiage (2017/04/30) Anyone want a Tuco? ~Grogg Tree
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  #144  
Old 11-13-2017, 08:45 PM
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Jimmy did all the talking anyway so it didn't matter.


Bob has a common cold
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  #145  
Old 11-16-2017, 03:40 PM
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... As all the rare colds were already taken.

--

"Help, I'm being robbed!"
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  #146  
Old 12-04-2017, 11:52 AM
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Funny? Odd? Why not both.
 
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"It's pronounced robed," Rob the tailor sighed. It was the third time this week someone had made that joke.

---

"Should that light be blinking like that?"
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  #147  
Old 12-17-2017, 03:44 AM
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what is this I don't even
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"Only when a new universe is about to be birthed," said the technician, monitoring the panel for the gods.

_________

The return of the legends created a plot twist.
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  #148  
Old 12-17-2017, 08:24 AM
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The choose your own adventure didn't have enough votes.
—————
this seems easy enough
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  #149  
Old 12-19-2017, 02:00 PM
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what is this I don't even
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...until Maximus forgot to carry the 1, resulting in a black hole forming 3 feet away from him as he flipped the switch.

_____________________


The snow was something that was greatly welcomed.
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I'm back...but not really.
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  #150  
Old 12-21-2017, 02:10 AM
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Until the snow coalesced into Arnok, a snow demon from the 6th level of Hell-Frozen-Over, who then proceeded to eat every Who down in Who-ville, the tall and the small...

---

Merry Christmas to all,
and to all a good...
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Digestive Disorder Support Thread (2018/04/23)
As a SNOT:WWAD TA, I find your lack of style disturbing. Prove me wrong.
Open game for SNOT:WWADs, CSs, and anyone I'm in a game with: The Adventures of Aleksandr Quickfoot
Vort's Verbiage (2017/04/30) Anyone want a Tuco? ~Grogg Tree
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